The John Wayne vs Apron String Approach to
My husband and I have different views on
parenting.
He likes to recount a scene from an old John Wayne
movie, "Hondo", where a young boy doesn't know how
to swim. Raised solely by his mother who was
never able to teach him, the boy was afraid of the
water. Hondo, in true John Wayne manner, picks up
the lad and flings him out in the middle of a
pond. And guess what? He swims. Had to. Or he
would have drowned.
And that's been pretty much my husband's
approach. His advice for parents would be to just
chuck the kid out into the middle of the pond.
Let him sink ...or swim. He's pretty much the
same way when it comes to managing child
behavior. "Let reality be the teacher", he'd
advise. Learn from the school of hard knocks.
Let him touch the hot stove. He won't do it a
second time.
Well, I'm a mom, and I'm much too protective to
adopt this approach. Where my kids are concerned,
I want to protect them from all of life's
abrasions. I think most moms are like this. We
devour articles on parenting, hoping for the right
advice. Hoping that we're doing the right thing.
We try to guide our kids through life as gently as
we can. It tears us apart to see them hurt or
injured.
My husband would argue that his method is the most
humane and caring because it makes the child
stronger and prepares him better for the
difficulties that lie ahead. And maybe he's
right. I suspect though, that in spite of his
macho stance, he's secretly monitoring the
situation and is ready to step in to help if he's
needed.
At any rate, to resolve our different approaches,
we invented a tool for child behavior management.
We call it the Better Behavior Wheel. Basically,
it consists of a roulette wheel type of board with
consequences around the perimeter instead of
numbers. When our kids misbehave they get to
spin.
It's very effective.
But where it really shines, in my opinion, is in
the
way it combines both of our parenting styles
so there's no longer any disagreement on the
appropriate course of action.
With the Wheel we all sit down ahead of time and
select which consequences should be put on the
board for each particular misbehavior. My husband
gets to have his say, as do the kids and myself.
Once we've all agreed, there's no more discussion
or disharmony. When the kids misbehave, out comes
the Better Behavior Wheel. And as parents, we're
no longer the 'bad guys', but merely interested
bystanders. Child behavior management has never
been easier.
When we showed the device to our friends they all
wanted one too, so we reluctantly started building
them. Today we've helped over 10,000 grateful
parents with our invention, and the orders just
keep coming in.
Not only did the Wheel give us well behaved kids,
it also created peace and harmony in our home, as
my husband and I no longer argue over how to deal
with our kids' innapropriate behavior.
Today, our kids have grown into delightful young
adults, and we like to think that the Wheel had a
great deal to do with that.
A mother of 4 kids from Eugene, Oregon, Julie
Butler now lives in central British Columbia
where she markets the Better Behavior Wheel to
grateful parents.
You can find more information about the better Behavior
Wheel, or order one for yourself, at:
http://www.budsbestbuys.com/wheel.htm
This article reprinted with permission, by Ken Asselin
Who is Webmaster for the Buds Best series of Online
Shopping Sites.http://www.shopping.budsbestbuys.com
About the Author
None
|
